The title just felt right to me even though the grammar makes me feel like I’m dying a little inside.
I’ve been convicted of a lot of things in the last year (by the Holy Spirit, not the legal system for clarification), and time is one of those things.
If you would ask me what are the 5 most important priorities (things, people, values, etc) in my life I would say the following:
- Jesus (reading the Bible, prayer, ministry, worship)
- My husband (quality time together)
- My friends and family – equally because they are really one and the same (doing things that deepen these relationships)
- Taking care of my body (eating well, exercise)
- Traveling/Experiencing the world
The only problem is that the list I just gave you is only true for hypothetical me. You know, the one who is a perfect follower of Jesus and never binge watches Netflix. She seems really cool, and I’d like to be her someday, but I’m not. At least not yet.
Time has a funny way of making a liar out of every one of us because time doesn’t lie.
It’s really easy to spew out a list like the one above when someone asks, “What’s important to you.” But I think if we are honest, most of us are probably talking about hypothetical selves when we answer that question.
Because how we choose to spend our time in real life is a better display of our priorities than some list. Ever hear the phrase ‘actions speak louder than words?’
If I had to rewrite that list based on time alone, where the things that I devote most time to are highest up on the list, I think it would look something like this:
- Work (I know. We all have to do it, but we still give our time to it, and it needs to be included)
- Perusing the internet (Facebook, Pinterest, etc)
- Cleaning my house
- My husband
Jesus isn’t even on the list of the top 5 things that I give the most time to. Honestly, if it were a list of 6, He would be next, but it’s not, and that’s still a problem. Because when I say that Jesus is the most important person in my life; that my relationship with Him matters more to me than anything else, I should be able to back that up. People should be able to see that by the way I choose to spend my time. If I say that my husband comes next to nothing and no one but Jesus, I shouldn’t spend more time watching Netflix than I do talking to or just sitting in silence with him.
The enemy is really good at making us forget how precious our time on earth really is. Tomorrow is not promised.
I could easily pray all day as I work, but I don’t. It’s truly not difficult to be in a place of communion with the Lord, but it is difficult to stay in that place. And I guess that’s something I’m still trying to figure out.
What I know for now, though, is that I don’t want to talk about hypothetical me anymore. I want to be her. I want to be the woman that has Jesus number one and my husband number two. I want to be the woman who, instead of watching a whole season of Gilmore girls, builds the storage bench I’ve been talking about for months now.
And I’m not saying there is anything necessarily wrong with watching a whole season of Gilmore Girls in one sitting. If it doesn’t bother you, go for it. I just know that when the Holy Spirit convicts me, He doesn’t want me to sit around doing the same old things anymore, and neither do I.